The headcount of pastors leaving ministry roles is staggering sometimes. Maybe you know of a pastor who has left full-time ministry. Maybe you are one. Or maybe you’re in the painful wrestling moments before deciding whether to stay or leave. When asked about the reason behind leaving ministry jobs, the most common responses include:

1. Money 
2. Moral failing 
3. Frustrations 
4. Burnout 
5. Busyness
6. Stress 
7. Family difficulties 

These are the commonly cited issues deterring pastors from continuing on in their ministry roles. And there are many others as well. But what if we have missed a core reason for these pastors’ departures? What if there was a deeper reason lurking under the surface that no one seems to talk about? 

It may not come to a surprise that many pastors actually leave ministry for one reason: Loneliness. Loneliness isn’t as understandable though. It almost seems selfish to say “ministry is lonely.” After all, if there is one job in the world where you are often around people, wouldn’t ministry be that job? 

But it could be argued that there is no other job in the world where you can be so lonely, all while constantly being around people. The pulpit is a lonely place. Pastoral leadership is a lonely place. Anytime we are lonely, we are susceptible to extreme discouragement. The rising pressures of leading a church bring additional stress and the potential for loneliness as well. 

In the midst of loneliness and discouragement, it’s easy to lose sight of our calling. You may find a lack of support from certain people. You may find discouragement when you consider various team members. But what does God say about our role? About your calling? His voice matters most. 

We’d like to offer four helpful ways you can make sure loneliness doesn’t rob you from the joy of ministry…. 

1. Find strength in the Saints 

Through stories of past saints, we can find fulfillment and encouragement knowing that they too dealt with loneliness. David, in his isolation and loneliness, was led to remember God’s faithfulness. You can read his personal responses and reflections all throughout the Psalms. Elijah, in his discouragement and defeat, was met with a practical need from God–food! Your feelings of loneliness and discouragement are valid, but the invitation here is to see how God wants to meet you and reconcile. Time and time again in Scripture, God shows up for the lonely. And their reward is greater than any momentary feelings of despair. 

2. Find substance in Scripture 

Scripture is what sustains us. In it we find the beautiful reminder that we never walk alone. Verse after verse gives us the assurance that we have a God named Emmanuel (God with us). If He is always with us, then we are never alone. 

3. Find safety in servants 

There are other servants who you can look to for safety. Many of these servants would be honored to walk alongside you in your loneliness. In fact, other people in ministry are often the safest people to open up to. They’ve experienced your struggles. They know the trap of loneliness. In ministry, “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” 

4. Find satisfaction in serving 

It continues to be true that one of the best ways to get “out of a rut” is to simply serve. Sometimes ministry jobs are all about serving, so we fail to serve out of the overflow of our hearts. Perhaps you should evaluate where you are serving that doesn’t have anything to do with your job expectations. Press into it. Not to just be more busy, but to be busy doing the right things. 

Loneliness has done more damage than perhaps any other weapon formed against pastors. Perhaps you’re in the midst of it now and ready to quit.

Before you do, take intentional time to evaluate your loneliness. Where is it coming from? What does God have to say about it? And then step into action correcting the problem. Correcting the problem may mean continuing on in your exit, or it may lead you to find renewed strength and energy to sustain you further in this ministry role.