One of the people I reached out to was Dr. Gary Allen, the National Director of Pastoral Care for the Assemblies of God. I asked what their denomination was doing in way of follow up for pastors who have left vocational ministry.
“There is probably some attempt on the local level,” he said. “On the national level, I know it can be distant. When we’re dealing with 35,000 ministers, we have to push that back to the local level. My experience was to try to reach out to those that were in my purview at a sectional level or in a local radius. Again, it flow both ways. There has to be the reaching out.”
I appreciate the attempts of Dr. Allen, and the other denominational leaders I spoke with, to provide support and care to pastors in their respective denominations. I truly believe they are sincere in their efforts and that, in their immediate circle, they are making an impact. But I question why we would leave most of the support and follow up to local pastors, especially when most are themselves overworked and focused exclusively on their own ministries.
When I asked a different leader concerning what his particular denomination does for pastor follow up, he quickly answered, “Not much.”
Like I mentioned earlier, I worked in a large denomination for about five years. In that time, not a single pastor or leader, outside our local church, reached out to me. I attended some sectional events here and there, but even during those gatherings I had to seek out other pastors and leaders to connect with. I am not trying to throw anyone under the bus because I don’t have much room to talk – I rarely reached out to other pastors in my area. I am, however, trying to prove this point: On a local level, pastors and sectional leaders (more often these too are local pastors) are simply too busy to reach out to other pastors or those struggling with their walk with Christ, their family or ministry.
I think we could start moving in a better direction if denominations:
1) Were more intentional with connecting with their pastors.
2) Updated resources and programs for pastors (or develop them if there are none).
3) Offered practical classes for young pastors, giving them realistic expectations of the job.
4) Formed follow-up programs (or improved existing programs) that rely less on local pastors.
Another person I talked with had this to say about following up with those who quit full-time ministry: “I would say about 80% of the time, the person who left, left under such duress and disappointment and so forth that they really didn’t want much contact. They’ve been hurt. They’ve been wounded. And that’s why they left.”
I would agree that, yes, they’ve been wounded and hurt. But speaking for myself – and I’m sure many expastors would agree – I would have loved for someone to reach out to me, offering support and encouragement. I would have loved practical classes explaining the goods and bads of ministry life. I would have loved better, more relevant and updated resources and programs to turn to for encouragement and edification. I would have loved connecting with more pastors.
And although I’m not entirely sure it would’ve made a difference in my departure from pastoral ministry, it might have made some things and decisions a bit easier.
Jim
When I left the pastorate after more than 35 years of volunteer service in our state Baptist convention, I heard from no one from the state offices. After all the investment of time, I would have thought someone would have attempted to make a contact. Neither have I been used by any Baptist churches following my departure. I am finding great fulfillment as a chaplain and for the first time feel like I am doing a real ministry.
You might contact the Ministering to Ministers Foundation out of Richmond, VA. I have found their work to be a great resource for clergy going through forced termination.
Bo Lane
That’s unfortunate, Jim. But thanks for your comment. That’s why we’re trying to get the word out. Hopefully we can start seeing the stats change in a positive direction. Many blessings to you, friend.
Dave Jacobs
You guys consistently put out good stuff. Keep it coming.
Bo Lane
Thanks for the kind words, Dave. Be blessed.
Gerri
Thanks for posting this valuable information. My husband and I were pioneer Baptist missionaries overseas. He pastored a missionary church. When we resigned as missionaries after about 14 years of service, there was no one to help us. While we struggled at times on the mission field, unfortunately, not many of our churches even communicated with us. We felt abandoned…but we also know that many other missionaries have endured the same trials.
Bo Lane
Gerri, thanks for your comment. Would love to hear more about your missionary work. Please feel free to connect with me further. And thanks for joining in on the conversation. Be blessed.
Gerri
Thanks Bo…we are so thankful for the privilege of representing the Lord on our mission field..it truly was a blessing to experience His presence, power and provisions while there. Although nothing worthwhile is ever accomplished easily, it was on the field that God renewed our faith and taught us so much about serving Him and others. My husband and I still have a passion for mission work and are praying for Him to send us out again. It’s so worthwhile and fulfilling being able to impact others for His kingdom.
Shhh, don't tell my denominati
Great article. I really appreciate that you are tackling some difficult subjects that need to be addressed. I took what I thought was going to be about a 6 month sabbatical but it has turned into 2 years and counting. I moved to a new area for family reasons. When I contacted my local denominational leaders to ask if I could get connected with the local pastors, I was told that I could not participate. This was very disheartening and discouraging. I had given 25 years of faithful service and now I am completely disconnected. It has been very hard and discouraging. I find it interesting that if you ask the leaders about “connectedness” and “inclusiveness”, they would tell you that they are very welcoming. When you ask the average pastor in the trenches or those that have taken a rest for a season, they will tell you, there is no support and they make you feel like you have a disease. The reality is, most denominational leaders are disconnected from what is really happening in the real world of pastoring. In the mean time, I have found Chaplaincy very rewarding. Have you notice how many have made this same statement about Chaplaincy.
Bo Lane
Great thoughts. I’d love to hear more of your story. If you have a chance, please email me at bo(at)bolane(dot)org. Blessings.
patrick
As a divorced pastor I have found a lack of support by church leaders as well as colleagues. They are either unwiliing or unable to provide counsel. ronically my congregation has been very supportive. I’m interested in providing help yo hurting pastors and have offered to do so. What might be an effective means to accomplish this? Patrick
Bo Lane
Patrick, please send me an email at bo(at)bolane(dot)org. And thanks for the comment. Be blessed.
Tony Bolen
Twice I was let go from LC-MS congregations for unScriptural reasons (once for refusing to play favorites with the controlling Matriarchal family, and once because the congregation “could no longer afford a full-time minister). Both times the denominational hierarchy did nothing more than try to have my mental state “evaluated” (my wife’s as well!!!), and both times, the denomination did absolutely nothing to follow up with either spiritual or temporal care. Several colleagues have had similar experiences…all the while the LC-MS continues to cry about a “ministerial shortage.” God bless those of you who’ve received support when the chips are down, but if you desire to be faithful to the heritage of Martin Luther, may God be with you!
Andy Moore
Was my post from yesterday taken down? It is no longer here. 🙁
Bo Lane
Andy, we did not receive anything from you yesterday nor was anything deleted. Please feel free to repost what you submitted. Thanks.
Andy Moore
What I wrote yesterday was that the church we left didn’t want to have anything to do with the denomination with which it was affiliated. When I talked with the denom. heads they only said I needed to fix whatever was the issue because the local church is autonomous, they can’t interfere with anything they decide. After we vacated the ministry there, the first place the church went was to the denomination to get them to supply an interim there until they call another minister. The denom. left us high and dry and has not checked on us since. Because the majority of denominations (and churches) seem to follow a business model for structure and ministry order rather than a biblical one, we shall always be left to the wolves. So sad.
me
Another issue that needs consideration is the amount of ministers left high and dry after a church closes down. Denominations need to do more to support and ensure that ministers go through the process of healing instead of leaving them on the rubbish heap. Finding God’s will after ministry is a difficult feat with faced with isolation, loneliness and brokenness. We found that after 5 years of ministry as senior pastor that no body wanted to know us we couldn’t even find a spiritual home that was accepting of us as many churches do not like ex ministers. I’ve been out of the ministry over 5 years now and the heartbreak we have felt during that time can not be put into words. But we are so grateful that our God heals the broken hearted that in the midst of hopelessness he is there to give hope for the future. We still struggle with finding God’s purpose for our lives because our call is the ministry. My heart goes out to ex pastors, its not an easy road but I pray that you find hope and healing in Christ.
Larissa Douglas
My husband was fired (the last of 4 or 5 pastors from this single church) there was not support from the local association, national denomination or even the church, they lied to us about severance. We were seriously disheartened that there are ministries for pastors who have a moral failure but for those who are wrongly accused and forced out because of unbelieving membership there is no care. We were forced to rely on our own savings. Eventually a seminary president whom we knew from our undergraduate studies heard our story and have us some much needed moral and referential support, which encouraged us immensely. We also received support from a theological author my husband contacted. But nothing denominational. We are now serving in another denominational church and don’t harbor bitterness but it seems there is a stigma on “failed pastors” even when they aren’t guilty! Even our friends or fellow
TheVillain
Good article. If I could add one thing to the list, it would be this:
Have an honest conversation about burnout. Specifically, how to assess, prevent, and especially treat it. I have spent my entire life in the church (with one denomination or another) and accepted my own call to ministry when I was a junior in high school. Went to college for the BA in theology, and finished seminary (Master of Arts in Counseling Ministry, concentration in Pastoral Care/Chaplaincy). I’ve been ice skating uphill for years trying to make the chaplaincy thing work, and one of the scariest parts of the discernment and inner work that I have seen from peers is how both in preparation for ministry, and in the practice thereof, burnout is misunderstood, misdiagnosed, and mistreated.
By and large, most of the people I’ve known who have walked away from ministry as a profession have all identified burnout as a major contributing factor. But in our congregations, our polities, and in our seminary classrooms we treat the pastor who says “I’m feeling burned out lately” or “I’m afraid of getting burned out” like we treat the terminally ill. Even in the more liberal congregations I’ve been a part of, burnout was regarded as a sort of excommunication, as if it were a pale of sorts from which there was no return. Couple that with the overwhelming expectation placed on new or younger pastors to be able to quietly and graciously handle 60-90 hours of work a week, and what you have is a recipe for disaster.
I’m sure there are a lot of different definitions of burnout, and a lot of different lenses of faith by which we can assess burnout in ourselves or others, but in my professional experience, we are radically and woefully under equipped to face it. We need to talk about it. We need the liberty to do so, and the assurance that discerning burnout will not result in a pink slip. Some of the most brilliant and effective pastors I’ve ever met have left because of burnout. Some rage quit and burn so many bridges that they blacklist themselves from returning (if ever) to ministry. Some quietly leave and regardless of where they wind up, mourn their ministry for years. Sure we tell our pastors to take care of themselves in the classroom, but in the field, it’s a vastly different experience. So let’s have an honest conversation about burnout.